Talk to me and listen too

via Daily Prompt: Automatic

I am a vocal person, an extrovert. This of course has advantages and disadvantages. On one hand, if you are in a relationship with me, you will always know where you stand. On the other hand, sometimes my mouth gets me into trouble because I am outspoken.

I was in a relationship years ago where the guy I was with was wonderful at making me feel loved, through both his words and actions, but was very passive aggressive when it came to expressing anything that bothered him.He let his frustrations build up to resentment, which is a relationship killer, and it killed ours.

I have also been in a relationship where the guy has told me exactly how he felt and called me out on my bullshit, for lack of a better word 🙂 and I have to say, although at times, it was hard to hear and sometimes stung, I at least knew where I stood.

Sometimes in our relationships we begin to run on automatic and assume we know what our partner is feeling and thinking. This is not always true. Assumptions also kill relationships. I have been the recipient of that thinking as well. But I also know that it is not easy, especially for an introvert, to express what he or she is feeling, but you have to do your best to communicate to your partner. I have married friends who keep a jar in their bedroom and they write notes to each other that they cannot express vocally. It might sound a little strange or quirky but it works for them. It helps to open up the conversations they need to have.

And yes, I do make mistakes with communication too. But I learn and move on. Don’t be afraid to say what you feel, it may not give you the response you want to hear but at least you will be heard. And listen to your partner, really listen, so they may be heard as well.

#dailyprompt

 

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About geminilvr

I have been through many relationships in my life, most long term, and they have all shaped who I am in some way. I try to find humor through the pain and heartbreak and find the strength to do it all over again. Navigating the dating waters in my forties isn't easy but hey what in life is? My blog is sprinkled with past relationships, current status and thoughts on it all! I hope my experiences make you smile, laugh or cry along with me and relate to the complexity that is life, my life, perfectly imperfect.
This entry was posted in blogging, breakups, communication, dailyprompt, dating, forgiveness, goals, heartbreak, hurt, life lesson, love, relationship goals, relationships, sorry, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

16 Responses to Talk to me and listen too

  1. Mick Talbot says:

    All true, read my response, automation kills.
    Take care – Mick

    Liked by 1 person

  2. brijkaulblog says:

    IT IS ALWAYS GOOD TO SPEAK ONE’S MIND WHATEVER THE CONSEQUENCES. YOUR POST IS DIRECT AND STRAIGHT .
    READ MY BLOGS BRIJKAULDIARY.COM

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Communication is so important in a relationship. Im trying to fix my relationship with my brother and communication was the first thing I had to work on.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. yuhublogger says:

    Lovely writing. “Assumptions also kill relationships.” This is so true.

    Liked by 2 people

  5. mandibelle16 says:

    I like the idea of the jar actually. It’s a safe zone essentially, rather than confronting each other over everything. Then maybe you pick your battles as opposed to fighting over every little thing that upsets you. Love your blog!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. “Don’t be afraid to say what you feel,”

    Ok I wont

    “On one hand, if you are in a relationship with me, you will always know where you stand. ”

    Damn girl you must be the only female in the world that can offer this service, do you offer lessons to other females? 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • geminilvr says:

      it’s the truth I hate game playing and I loathe passive aggressiveness

      Liked by 1 person

      • Without casting any shadows that ought not be there most of the people I know who claim to hate passive aggressiveness practice is just as much as those around them but they claim they don’t.

        I don’t have a problem with truth and game playing being issues but most women I know bottle things up and never tell a person why they are annoyed, upset or worse still, happy. I get told off for the same thing at times but the line between sharing and whining is often way too fine.

        Liked by 1 person

  7. I like plainspeaking and communication is the sustenance of every relationship.
    I am hosting a blog party right now on my blog and you are invited.
    Here’s the link https://acookingpotandtwistedtales.com/2017/01/28/yay-its-party-time-come-right-in/

    Liked by 1 person

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