Know your true worth

worth

I love to write ideas and save quotes on my notepad on my phone. I do it constantly as ideas endlessly swirl in my head. I finally took some time the other day to sort through the never ending list of notes and came across some text I had entered this past August. I was going through a very rough patch at the time and would sit outside my place of work, also known as my happy place, when I needed to clear my head. Bringing my laptop outdoors into the sunshine would lift my mood, even if just for a while. One day as I was sitting outside and enjoying the sunshine, I received some great advice from a colleague who is a Professor at the University in which I work. Whenever he would see me he would stop and chat for a bit. He was always trying to teach me how to start meditating and to always be grateful for the good in my life. On that day I was not feeling grateful for anything and as for meditating, I still struggle and blame it on my overactive mind. Kudos to anyone who can practice it.

As I was telling him of some recent events in my life and the difficult period I was currently going through, I also told him about how I was contemplating blogging but not sure if I had the “guts” to do it. Then the tears started. I wasn’t sobbing, it was more of what I like to call tiny tears, the kind that well up in your eyes but not flow. He noticed the change in my demeanor. I am usually the person that can hide my feelings in public very well, but eventually my facial expressions will tell a different story. He then said to me “opportunity is everywhere, embrace it, no matter how scared you are.” He then went on to add “Time is not guaranteed, don’t waste it wondering what you should have done, just do it and always know your true worth even if you don’t immediately see it and others around you do not see it.”  We ended up talking for a very long time. I didn’t divulge everything going on in my life, I didn’t have to, but he knew I had a lot troubling me. He shared some of his personal history with me and how far he had come in healing. I was surprised to hear his story, he always seemed so at peace and positive. As he left he told me he would send me positive energy and pray for me. I remember feeling very comforted, even if it was just for a moment. But his words spoke to me.

Stop being afraid and always know your true worth. How many times in my life I based my worth on what other people thought of me. How I look or what type of job I had, where I went to school, if I was married or had kids. The list goes on. The older you get the more you begin to realize that all of that doesn’t matter. It is what is inside of you, how you view yourself that matters most. I still struggle with aspects of myself at times. I think we all do. But I have learned to appreciate what I have to offer as well.

I lived with a guy who wouldn’t admit to his friends that we were a couple. He wouldn’t admit it to himself either. I still don’t know why I allowed him to treat me this way. Was it related to my self-worth at the time? It was a painful feeling, extremely painful. I do know that when we met I was in a vulnerable place. I take full ownership of letting him treat me that way, I allowed it to happen. I learned from it and I never want to feel that way again. And I won’t because I won’t let it happen. Always know your true worth. How important those words really are. I vowed to never let a man define me again, or anyone else for that matter.

Many days I’m still finding my way in this world, but I now know my true worth. Life is one big journey isn’t it? There is no guaranteed path, but you need to know that it is your journey. Trust in yourself and forgive yourself if you fall. Don’t look at your mistakes as failures. Mistakes don’t define you nor do they decrease your value as a person. Only you can devalue yourself. And yes I’ll admit there are still days I am hard on myself, but those thoughts eventually pass too and I move on. Some days I am strong and some days I feel as if I want to pull the covers over my head and hide, but one thing I do know is I am worth it. No matter what happens, or what I do, or how many crazy decisions I make, I am worth it.

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About geminilvr

I have been through many relationships in my life, most long term, and they have all shaped who I am in some way. I try to find humor through the pain and heartbreak and find the strength to do it all over again. My blog is sprinkled with past relationships, current status and thoughts on it all! I hope my experiences make you smile, laugh or cry along with me and relate to the complexity that is life, my life, perfectly imperfect.
This entry was posted in blogging, breakups, communication, forgiveness, goals, hurt, life lesson, love, relationships, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

34 Responses to Know your true worth

  1. I’m glad he took the time to talk to you, he may not have said definitively that you needed to start that blog but without him you may not have done it. He deserves a pat on the back just for that.

    Another well written piece too, congratulations.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Pingback: Know your true worth — And then there was one | Tangible Triumph

  3. This is so inspiring and great writing!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Lovely post ❤ ❤ Its so important to know your true worth 🙂 🙂 Love this x x

    Liked by 1 person

  5. L. Rorschach says:

    Inspiring words. ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

  6. bklynboy59 says:

    It is ironic that I read this post first today. I am at a place in my life where at work I don’t feel appreciated and the powers to be don’t understand what I bring to the table, so my quest in 2017 is to find work that matches my value and be somewhere that appreciates what I bring to the table. In my personal life my father and sister have been cold towards me for some time without much being said and I am now looking to find a way to break that . My goal is to strengthen that relationship I am going to do what I can on my end. I hope they see the value that I have with in the family and what I bring to the table…if not then I am going to appreciate those who do appreciate me like my wife, my daughter and my step kids and build on those as well as my friends. Life is too short for drama but not too short to show others that I matter. It is up to them to understand that or not.

    Liked by 1 person

    • geminilvr says:

      Family relationships are hard I get that and it’s true you can only do what you can to repair. We spend so much time at work I’m lucky that finally I found a job where my work is valued and I’m valued. I’ve experienced the opposite and it is so deflating. I hope in 2017 that you find that job too. Whatever happens with your family may be beyond your control but you are lucky to have to your wife in your corner, that support is so very important and she is lucky too that she has a husband who appreciates her.

      Liked by 2 people

      • bklynboy59 says:

        Thank you. I finally realized it bothers me more because I feed off my family not needy but feed off the good and for whatever reason the lack of communication has bothered me more than apparently them

        Liked by 1 person

  7. Nice to meet a brave person like you who is true to herself. It was really hard when you think of what would people around you will say but eventually they will forget it. Still this is a good eye-opener for everyone. Nice read!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Andrei says:

    You’re such a brave soul. Your bravery in facing life’s gargantuan challenges is, in itself, proves much of your worth! I’m amazed by you!

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Really appreciate your sharing.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. TheOriginalPhoenix says:

    This is so true and such an important message. Don’t let anyone other than you dictate your self-worth. The word ‘self’ is in it for a reason! I was really scared when I started my blog too and, obviously, I didn’t have much of a readership back then either. You really have to be self-motivated and love what you’re doing or else you’ll be rooted out pretty quickly. I’m so happy that you’re continually finding yourself and the right people to be around. I love meditating when I’m stressed out. 🙂 God bless you.

    Liked by 2 people

  11. Keri L. says:

    Wow. It was tough for me to understand that the person who is the hardest for me to love is myself, but once I started loving myself, once I decided to make that choice everyday, I realized that I am worthy. I’m worthy of happiness, of success, of allowing myself to feel. Thank you for writing this, I believe a lot of people will find encouragement in it. Happy New Year!

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Nina Rubin says:

    This is a great post and reminds me of one I wrote a while back called “what’s it worth?” I think it’s important to know there’s a cost and payoff to everything, and our self-worth is no different.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. ladyinthemountains says:

    Great read again. Thank you. I know this has been something I have struggled with. My self esteem was in the toilet four years ago and now it is better than it has ever been in my life due to lots of wonderful friends I have vowed to myself that I will never let anyone affect how I feel about myself again. I am an amazing wonderful caring woman and I will never forget that again.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Pingback: Know your true worth | my rants, dreams, and thoughts on everything

  15. Pingback: You are good enough | And then there was one

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