Fish Free Zone

via Daily Prompt: Fishing

Today’s daily prompt immediately brought me back to the world of online dating. It’s been over three months since I took my hook out of the water and stopped fishing for dates. Relationship girl was thrown into non-relationship status and had to enter the dating world again. It sucked and I suck at it too. I heard someone refer to the dating site I was on, Plenty of Fish, as Plenty of Duds and although that is a pretty funny analogy I did meet some great guys on the site. But now that I’ve gone dark with my profile I have to say I do not miss it at all.

Online dating is hard. Just trying to keep up with and weed through messages was exhausting. I had one slip-up and went back online for two hours @three weeks ago. As soon as messages started coming in, I completely regretted it and went dark again. I didn’t want to be there. I have been concentrating on one guy, who I really like, and am excited about where we may be heading. Why did I slip up and go back on briefly? I was the one this time who almost ran at the first hint of trouble, something I never do. Maybe I just got a little scared and was preparing myself to be hurt again, I wasn’t sure if he really wanted to be with me. I was getting in my own head again. This time, we talked about it. I knew in my heart I didn’t want to run away, neither did he. And we didn’t.

He is real and genuine. He recently asked me what I like about him. I was honest and told him his compassionate heart, everything else about him was gravy. It’s the truth. That is what matters to me. I don’t care about status, degrees, houses, etc. Never did. I care about substance, character. In this modern dating world where people ghost, slow fade, bench, run away or avoid at the first hint of trouble, I am happy we found each other. He communicates, which can be rare to find. In my last relationship I tried too hard and sadly, he didn’t. He wanted no drama and I was afraid to share mine. And when I did, I felt him pull away. It hurt, a lot. As crazy as I was about him, I want someone who can stick by me, ask me if I’m okay or just plain tell me to stop acting irrational. I’m fairly easy to please but I’m also human. I will make mistakes, but I will also forgive yours.

I’m cautiously optimistic. I’m afraid to write anymore because I don’t want to jinx it. I won’t give him a code name  either (lol). I’m still healing and dealing with some shit, but I’m letting my light shine through again. He gets me, I get him. And this time, no one is running away, including me. At least, not yet.

Happy Saturday everyone – enjoy your weekend.

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About geminilvr

I have been through many relationships in my life, most long term, and they have all shaped who I am in some way. I try to find humor through the pain and heartbreak and find the strength to do it all over again. My blog is sprinkled with past relationships, current status and thoughts on it all! I hope my experiences make you smile, laugh or cry along with me and relate to the complexity that is life, my life, perfectly imperfect.
This entry was posted in blogging, communication, dailyprompt, dating, goals, life lesson, love, online dating, postaday, relationships, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

17 Responses to Fish Free Zone

  1. chungwipff says:

    Great blog post! I’ve been happily married for 20 years and learning about the dating scene these days (in the age of technology) is fascinating. You are following your heart and instincts, which is always the right thing to do. That is how I met my husband (at a friend’s party).

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Good luck on your date hope you caught the big fish.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. ladyinthemountains says:

    Getting ready to shut down mine for a while, too. I just need a break from seeing the same guys and getting the same messages all the time. I have a couple of days left of my subscription and then vow to be off for 6 months and just live my life. I have also met a couple of great men (ex-bf) but also a lot of losers.

    Liked by 1 person

    • geminilvr says:

      Plenty of Fish is free, I wasn’t on any paid sites this summer. It is liberating to be off the sites, I think you will find peace of mind once you do. I still meet people in real life, although it’s a little more difficult, but I just am trying to focus on one guy for now. I think you and I may have to have a drink and share our stories and laugh

      Like

      • ladyinthemountains says:

        I paid for the upgrade on POF for three months. It wasn’t really worth it. Maybe my state of mind to it had something to do with it. I get tired of guys wanting to meet me that don’t even look at my profile. I am much more than my photos.

        Liked by 1 person

      • geminilvr says:

        I didn’t pay for the upgrade. I had guys that would say to me oh I noticed you were just on it again. I think when you pay it tells you when the person was on last which I found very disturbing. And yes I agree many didn’t even read my profile either.

        Like

      • ladyinthemountains says:

        There are a few things that you get with the upgrade. I like being able to see if someone read my messages if I found one worth communicating with. I am ready for the break though and just live my life not worrying about dating for a while

        Liked by 1 person

      • geminilvr says:

        well that explains a lot. I had guys that would also say don’t be shy respond, didn’t realize they could tell if i read their message(s) 🙂
        I guarantee you’ll benefit from a break from it all.

        Liked by 1 person

  4. I’m pulling for you! You mentioned guys who posted about not wanting a woman with “baggage.” When i reconnected with two high-school chums, all they wanted to know was “what happened.” My blog is for exposing the monster he was, not personal conversations. I didn’t understand why it was so important for them to know that part of my life.
    I didn’t get those questions on the dating site because I listed myself as “single.” I DID however, get the “I can’t believe you’ve never been married” crap, though.
    Again, here’s hoping for success. Won’t it just be Heavenly? 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Nice writing, good luck with it all 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  6. L. Rorschach says:

    Awww, he sounds great! Wishing you the best. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

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