You would think that once someone has hurt me, they would be banned from my life, relegated to a distant memory. Funny thing is I do the complete opposite, I allow them to remain a part of my life and sometimes they do. Not everyone stays in my life, some go away for good, either by their choice or mine. Sometimes the hurt is so bad that forgiveness is all you can offer and space is necessary.
Am I a glutton for punishment, naive, or just looking at life through rose-colored glasses? Some may think so. I’m not really sure. Once I get past the point of hurt I am still somehow able to maintain a relationship. It’s not easy and maybe it is a fault of mine. I’m as strong as a bull when I need to be and have a good bullshit radar too, but I also have a side of me that wants to believe there is good within all of us, no matter how much bad I have witnessed or experienced.
I have an Ex who has hurt me in the past pretty bad. We have reached a point where we are very friendly now. Strange how that all worked out. There are still times that he frustrates me but we get past it, I get past it, we move on. It is impossible for me to explain or even comprehend how or why I am able to do this, but I can and I do.It is a choice that I make and I don’t expect anyone to understand my choice, they are not me. I guess that is a part of me that will not change and I’m okay with it. I make no apologies for who I am.
I guess in the end that it is what makes all of us unique. There is no right or wrong how we approach our past and present relationships. What may seem completely absurd to one person, may be completely fine for another. We are all human, we all have faults and we all think and feel differently. Acceptance and love is the tougher road to take, and not always attainable, but it sure does feel good if you can. But don’t judge those who can’t either, I know I won’t.