There was a time in my life I felt I needed to be in a relationship to feel complete. As soon as I would go through a breakup there would be an urgent need to find someone to fill the void. Maybe that was one of my biggest problems in finding the right person, for me. I would find the wrong one, think I could fix him, and then hold on so tight, try way too hard, and at times suffocate the real me trying to please my partner.
I no longer have that sense of urgency. I have slowed down, taking life day by day, starting to enjoy the little things. I love who I am. I am happy with who I am too. I realize now that although I enjoy being in a relationship, I do not need to be. There is a big difference between the two.
I love love. I am a hopeless romantic. I love experiencing it and sharing it with someone, the good and the bad. Although I love to socialize, the quiet moments together are my favorite. The right guy needs no convincing, explanations or excuses of why he should be with me. He should just want to. My days of trying to convince someone to stay with me are over. Self-reflection is a powerful tool, it makes you realize what you want from life, relationships, etc. I’ve done a lot of it lately and let me tell you it has changed my outlook on me and what I want and deserve. No more urgent searching for ways to fix me to keep someone. No more texts, emails, phone calls pleading my case. Nope, stick a fork in that behavior, it’s done. I am good enough, always was and always will be.
The right guy doesn’t need to be perfect either, I would never expect that. He just needs to “get me.” He doesn’t need to sweep me off my feet, but if he does, he better catch me too when I fall, because I fall hard. Really hard.