Flattery – A Cry for Attention?

via Daily Prompt: Flattery

Flattery will get you everywhere with me. I admit it, I love a good compliment. I think it is because for so long I fought for a compliment of any kind from my Ex. Yes, it may be considered a sign of a lack of confidence or neediness. But at the time, I craved it, I needed it.

My Ex would rarely compliment me but would dish out the compliments to other women on his Facebook feed as if they were a free meal at the hottest restaurant. They were all gorgeous, beautiful, sexy, you name it, he said it.

I would always ask him why didn’t he compliment me? He would respond that he did and that I just didn’t hear him. He also liked to say that the more you dish out compliments the less they mean anything. I guess in a sense that is true, but maybe I was just craving more from him than just a compliment.

Looking back I was correct, it wasn’t his compliments that I was craving, it was his attention. He would spend his mornings after we woke up drinking coffee, going through his Facebook feed and paying attention to whatever else anyone was doing except for the person sitting right next to him. Readily dishing out the compliments to the women with perfect pictures and selfies, many of them flaunting themselves as to say “okay guys bring on the compliments!” He would always tell me – you’re real, they’re all fake. Flattering them means nothing. But he never did understand, it was his attention I craved, not his flattery. I tried to tell him but it fell on deaf ears or maybe blind eyes.

Which makes me wonder. These women on social media that post their daily selfies – they are the needy ones, not me. They are fishing for flattery, attention, daily comments to boost their own egos. Spending their days finding the best angles, lighting, filters, backgrounds for their selfies. How lonely and sad they must really be? Or maybe a tad narcissistic?

As for me, I no longer care about the Facebook comments. Maybe it’s because we are no longer together and I don’t care to read his comments anymore. Or maybe it’s because I realize that most of what you see on Facebook is fake.

Flattery will still get you everywhere with me, but really only from friends, family and people I know. They actually mean it when they flatter or compliment me. It feels good, I admit it.

And of course – flattery from the occasional cute stranger may not get you everywhere but it will get you a smile and a thank you and who knows, maybe a date 🙂

via #dailyprompt

 

 

 

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About geminilvr

I have been through many relationships in my life, most long term, and they have all shaped who I am in some way. I try to find humor through the pain and heartbreak and find the strength to do it all over again. Navigating the dating waters in my forties isn't easy but hey what in life is? My blog is sprinkled with past relationships, current status and thoughts on it all! I hope my experiences make you smile, laugh or cry along with me and relate to the complexity that is life, my life, perfectly imperfect.
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9 Responses to Flattery – A Cry for Attention?

  1. eddaz says:

    Men can be funny sometimes. Women need so much attention, that’s why we are women. Great post with flattery💞

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I enjoy your post. Without flattering you, it’s great.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. bklynboy59 says:

    If he was with you then he shouldn’t have been complimenting anyone else but you instead he compliments other women and gives some lame excuse why he doesn’t do the same with you ? I don’t have to wonder why he is your ex.
    Everyone no matter who we are loves flattery we all like to be told that we matter or that we are special or that we are attractive even when we may feel we are not. Especially from those we are in a committed relationship with. great post!

    Liked by 1 person

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